During this first semester, I have been learning how to save money and also what things are actually worth buying. If you know me, you know that when I shop I immediately head to the back of each store where the clearance racks are and that I never like to spend more than $10 on one item. That's just me. I guess you could say that I'm a "penny-pincher," but in all reality, I'm just a poor college student.
When you think of the word generous, what do you think of? Do you think of someone who gives things? Someone who gives money? Someone who gives time? Effort? With Christmas just around the corner, it's hard for me (and maybe for you) not to associate generosity with the act of giving... giving things, in particular.
Things are good. I mean, who wouldn't want a new iPhone, that fancy looking guitar, or a shiny new toaster oven?! I'm sure the latest device is on everyone's Christmas list this year. But what I'm starting to realize about all these "things" is that while they are great and useful and impressive, they leave no imprint on my life, or yours. For example, I don't even remember what I got for Christmas last year. Do you? These things may make you feel good for a little while, but at the end of the day (or week, or month, or year)... did you change because of that one "thing"?
Another thing about "things" is that they can always be replaced. Broken lap top? Best Buy has thousands of those. Dent in your Fender? Guitar Center. Cracked iPhone screen? No problem. House burnt down? Eh. Hey, it still can be replaced. You see, the point that I'm trying to make is that it all comes down to the fact that all these "things" really don't mean anything at all. I'm not saying that it's bad to go out shopping or spend a little money on yourself every now and then, no way! Do it, girl (or guy)! What I'm saying is that it's pointless to put your hope in the satisfaction that these "things" give you because it will just leave you empty and worrisome. Trust me, I've been there. I'm sure you have too.
Ultimately, I find rest in knowing that my money is not mine. My house is not mine. My iPhone is not mine. My body is not mine. It all belongs to Jesus. And what I mean by that is, I don't have to worry because He already has it figured out. He knows how much money is in my bank account, and He has plans for whatever amount is in there (heck, I don't even know how much I have right now. HA.) if I just let go and surrender it all to Him. He can use everything in my life to give glory to Him in some way or another, so why would I keep holding on so tightly to the last $5 in my wallet when He calls me to spend it on something else other than coffee?
On Black Friday, I went shopping at Aeropostale (I see you judgin' but don't judge me let me explain first you judger) because the whole store was 70% off. Of course it was incredibly crowded in there, but I decided to go in anyway and look around. I found a really good deal on their skinny jeans, and so I quickly grabbed two pairs and tried them on and bought them. When I got home that day, I tried on one of the pairs again and they were super loose on me for some reason. I must have been in such a rush that I didn't even notice how they fit at the store when I tried them on.
This might sound dumb (and it must've been that time of month...) but I just remember breaking down that day because I had bought this pair of skinny jeans that didn't fit and I couldn't return them because all the things in the store were final sale. My emotions might have been because it seemed like I had just thrown my money away.
After moping around for a couple hours crying about my loose-fitting skinny jeans (I give you permission to laugh at me), I remembered that my church was collecting warm clothes for a homeless shelter in Milwaukee. Immediately, a rush of peace came over me then because I knew what I was going to do with my jeans. And I did exactly that.
Even more recently, I went to the thrift store with some of my friends and I bought a bunch of blankets because they were super cheap. Originally I was planning on giving them as gifts to my family, but then I remembered the warm clothing drive at my church and I thought to myself, "I have like five blankets on my bed right now, and so does everyone else in my family. Not to mention all the other blankets we have just sitting in our storage room downstairs." And so the Sunday after I had donated my jeans, I donated all those blankets too. The coolest thing about these blankets was that one had a bible verse on it, and the other one had the footprint Jesus poem written on it. If you don't know that story you should check it out, just google "footprint Jesus poem." Point being, some random person will be cuddling up to those blankets and then most likely read what they say. How cool is that :)
So there's the skinny jeans and blanket story. It's such a beautiful thing to let go and trust God, specifically in the way that you spend your money. I was so upset about buying the wrong size jeans, but just think: maybe there's a girl at the shelter in Milwaukee who doesn't even have a single pair of jeans, and she'll be able to wear the ones I donated. Maybe there's someone there that has never owned a blanket before and is able to cuddle up to one with the a little bit of the gospel written on it.
So all you poor college students out there, don't let the Christmas season bring you down just because you have no money to get your friends and family "things." There are so many other ways you can let someone know you appreciate them, and I'm sure they'll remember a nice handwritten letter (cost: $0.00) rather than a expensive sweater or something.
I want to encourage you all to let go of your financial stress and just give it to God. He knows what He wants to do with your (His) money, and all you have to do is trust Him.
Sunday, December 11, 2016
Friday, November 18, 2016
An Open Letter to My Future Daughter
TO ALL WHO ARE ABOUT TO READ THIS POST THINKING THAT I'M PREGNANT:
I'm not. And will not be. Until I'm married. Moving on.
Dear Future Daughter,
Today I went to TJ Maxx, and I just couldn't help but notice the teeny weeny pre-put-together outfits hanging on the teeny weeny hangers. I thought about having my own daughter one day, and how freakin' excited I am to buy those tiny pre-put-together outfits and dress you all up in them. I can't wait to take millions of pictures of you and post them on social media and use them as my profile pictures on Facebook (Why do moms do this anyway? Maybe when I have my own kids I'll understand).
But even more than that, I can't wait to just hold you. The moment you pop out of my belly, I promise I'll be holding you right up to my chest (I wonder what that will feel like. I've always imagined that it'd feel like I'd be holding a warm burrito). Skin to skin, heartbeat to heartbeat. I can't wait to touch your little nose and to see your little nostrils flare as you breathe your very first breaths.
How cool is our God, that He already knows you and the beautiful plans He has for your life. This world is constantly changing, but His promises always remain the same. I pray that while your young, you will secure yourself in a foundation built on Christ the Rock, and that will be where you stand forever. I pray that you will grow and mature and find your purpose in Him alone.
Fast forward: Middle school. It will most likely be rough. When you feel like you don't have any friends to lean on, lean on Him. When you have friends to lean on, lean on Him. When homework piles up and you're feeling overwhelmed, turn to Him. When you're having the time of your life with zero responsibilities, turn to Him. When you look into the mirror, I hope that you see Him, and not an awkward/useless 12 year old. When you look to me and your father, I hope that you see Him as well, and not just two old people who boss you around and make you clean your room.
I believe that middle school can be a time of learning. And not just learning how to solve equations for Y, but also learning about yourself and who you are in Christ. If I could go back and tell myself these things, here's what I would say (I hope you consider this as advice): When you're neighbor friends tell you to ding dong ditch the old man across the street, don't do it. When that guy that you reeeaaalllyyy like scoots his chair up next to you in class when you're sitting all alone, don't ignore it. Rock those slippers and Aeropostale shirts, girl. You don't need makeup just because that one guy said you looked tired (he actually liked you, hon. Boys are just weird and never know the right way to get attention). Read your bible and find examples of godly women. Live that out at school. Keep on standing up for your faith, even when your friend tells you it's "all in your head." The Holy Spirit will give you the words to say when your hands shake. Trust Him.
Fast forward again: High school. It's your freshmen year and you're gonna be here for the next four years in this town (yes, I just quoted a Taylor Swift song and yes, I did listen to this song practically every day my freshmen year of high school). High school will be a lot of fun, and you'll probably go to your first formal dance when you're 15. Don't feel any pressure to get asked out by a guy, even though a lot of girls will be going with their boyfriends. Take my word for it, you'll have much much more fun dancing with your girls.
High school is a time of discovering. Discovering what you're hobbies are, what sports you're good at, what you may want to do for this rest of your life, etc. Sounds a little intimidating, right? Don't feel any pressure. The Lord will work everything out in His perfect timing. If you're like me, you'll have a lot of crushes in high school... but all of them won't last for long. You'll discover that feelings are fleeting and that your relationship with God is the most important relationship you'll ever have. I hope that you can find a youth group where you'll be able to make solid friends who you can call your sisters in Christ, and that the boys won't distract you as much as they distracted me.
I could continue to go on through your life and give you wisdom for each stage you will pass through, but the next stage I would have to write about would be college... and currently I'm freshmeat in college... so that will just have to wait until I have a little more wisdom about this part of life. I guess right now I can just tell you that being an adult is really fun. You'll drive like everywhere by yourself and buy your own food and do things on your own. Your independence will exponentially grow during this time, as will your dependence on God.
Alright girl, time for me to wrap things up. I can't wait for you to read this someday (if my blog is still up in like, 20 years).
Love,
Mackenzie
Friday, November 4, 2016
Beware, this post is sketchy.
If you know me, you know that I get scared super easily... my brown eyes grow to be the size of a watermelon, I jump about five feet in the air, and occasionally I make some weird sound. Trust me, you would have not wanted to be around me in high school whenever we had fire drills. You would have most likely been hit in the head with a pen or a calculator or something.
Have you used the word "sketchy" to describe a person or a place? I use it ALL the time (maybe because I'm scared all the time? LOL). According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, the word "sketchy" is defined as "likely to be bad or dangerous." Like most of y'all, I use the word to describe dark alley ways, run-down Mexican restaurants, downtown Green Bay (at night), fake clowns, pop-ups that claim I won $1,000, houses with the "beware of dog" signs in the windows, infomercials, etc.
I also tend to use this word to describe people. Maybe you do too.
"That gangsta walking toward me looks so sketchy!"
"Oh, crap... look at all those hoodlums with skateboards... SKETTCCCHYYY."
"He is SO sketchy... he just smiled at me across the hall! Who does he think he is?!"
Notice something about all three of these quotes? Here it is: When I call someone or a group of people sketchy, I don't even know who they are. I'm looking at what I see on the outside instead of what's on the inside. Yeah, yeah, yeah... what I just said was SUPER cheesy, but taking all cheesiness aside, it's true. And we can't help it. We all judge people by what we see... it's just what we do because we're broken people.
Let me tell you a story.
One Tuesday night this past September, I got a group of friends together for a "worship night" down on the city deck in downtown Green Bay. I brought my guitar and we jammed for Jesus for like, a full-on hour straight. It was awesome!! It was SO cool to be a witness to the random people walking by, just by praising our God. How sweet is it that we live in a place where we can worship our Savior freely.
Anyway, after the worship sesh, my friend Alyssa and my sister Haley and I walked down the deck to go to the bathroom. There were these skateboarder dudes doing tricks and stuff a little ways down the deck that we had to pass to get to the bathroom, and my first thought was, "Keep walking. Avert your eyes. Don't slow down. WALK."
We came closer and closer to the "sketchy" dudes, and as we passed them, one dude in a tie-dye shirt with long blonde hair said, "Hey ladies, how's it going?" Oh no. He just crossed the line. Totally flirting. Next thing you know, he'll be following us home. Gotta get the pepper spray out.
We quickly shouted back that we were FINE!, and continued to walk faster and faster to the bathroom. OUR LIVES WERE ON THE LINE, PEOPLE. (sarcasm)
After doing our business, we had to walk past the skateboarders again. Once more, we averted our eyes and walked straight ahead towards our destination. Then something happened that I would have never expected to happen in a million bazillion gillion years.
I saw the tie-dye shirt guy walk up to us and he said something like,
"Hey, I just wanted to say that what you guys are doing over there is super cool and it's awesome to see people so passionate about what really matters."
Hold up.
The tie-dye shirt guy said that? The "sketchy" one that we were preparing ourselves to pepper spray? Yes, yes he did say that.
The point of this story is, God doesn't call us to judge one another. Not based on looks, not based on actions, not based on words. We are not on His throne, and until we are (which will never happen, by the way), we will never be in the place where we can rightly judge someone else.
It's so easy to look at someone with green hair, saggy pants, and gauges the size of a quarter (and maybe a tie-dye shirt) and think, "Wow, I would never associate myself with THAT person." It's so easy for us to avoid people that we don't want to talk to, just because they look "sketchy" and we just don't want to deal with the awkwardness of the situation we anticipate.
But God never calls us to be comfortable.
Is this something I'm still working on? Yes. Is this something I will ever be perfect at? No. Like I said before, we are a broken people. All of us. Your pastor is just as broken as the kid next to you in class that smokes pot and hooks up on the weekends. God created us to be in need of the same thing... Love. And what's awesome about God is that He is Love.
I want to love the way God loves me. What does this look like? This looks like inviting a green-haired-swaggy-pants guy out to dinner. This looks like not seeing your interactions with random people as interruptions but rather as opportunities- opportunities to listen, to speak, to share, and to just be present. Real love - the way God loves us - is scary. But He calls us to love like we're not scared (cue For King & Country :P).
Honestly, I probably won't ever see the tie-dye shirt guy ever again. Who knows what God has in store. But I do know this: every day I see someone I have never ever seen before. Think about it - at a grocery store, gas station, on campus, walking their dog, etc. And this means that every day I see someone that I will never see again.
God has given these opportunities to us for a reason... during that one moment you encounter that one person, don't take it for granted. Don't avert your eyes. Don't start walking faster. Be that rare person that looks them straight into the eyes, smiles, and loves.
Once again Jesus went out beside the lake. A large crowd came to him, and he began to teach them. As he walked along, he saw Levi son of Alphaeus sitting at the tax collector’s booth. “Follow me,” Jesus told him, and Levi got up and followed him.
While Jesus was having dinner at Levi’s house, many tax collectors and sinners were eating with him and his disciples, for there were many who followed him. When the teachers of the law who were Pharisees saw him eating with the sinners and tax collectors, they asked his disciples: “Why does he eat with tax collectors and sinners?”
On hearing this, Jesus said to them, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.”
- Mark 2:13-17
Sunday, October 30, 2016
A Prayer
October 30th, 2016
Sunday
Dear God,
Tonight, I surrender to You. My plans, my thoughts, my actions, my pride, my ignorance, my arrogance - take it all from me, and replace it all with Your truth. Replace it with Your grace. Replace my visions of worldly things with visions of You. Remind me of what my chief end on earth is - to glorify You and to enjoy You. Remind me that You are good - You have already proved this to me, and You will continue to prove it to me over and over. Comfort me, God, and let me know that Your plans for me are always good, even when I can't see them unfold.
Tonight, I let go. I let go of whatever I'm holding onto so tightly that is not You. I let go with strength, and You comfort me. I let go with humility, and You comfort me. I let go with wisdom, and You comfort me. I let go in tears, but I am reminded of the pain that You suffered for me on the cross and how it is absolutely incomparable to the pain that I am feeling right now. I let go knowing that You are my only place of security. I let go, and I am reminded of Your love for me that surpasses all understanding and knowledge that a created mind could ever acquire.
God, embed a desire in my heart to know You more and more each and every day, and to not only love others, but to share the gospel with them, with words that come only from the Holy Spirit. Give me the strength, motivation, and grace to breathe my each and every breath for Your glory, and to live each and every day for Your glory alone. God, use me in ways that challenge me. Take me out of my comfort zone and use me in ways that I would not expect You to - only to remind me that You're the one who works through me, and I can do nothing out of my own strength.
Give me the strength to surrender. Remind me that surrendering is not a form of weakness, but rather, a form of strength and trust. I trust You. Lord, uncloud my mind and point my thoughts towards You and the ways that I can glorify You. Let me never focus on myself and my heart's selfish desires, but rather, let me focus on Your desires for me. When I face trials of many kinds, give me peace and comfort to sing your praises in the middle of whatever prison cell I'm in.
Give me a doubtless faith; a faith that allows me to look You straight into the eyes while this storm swallows up everything around me. And if I look away from You, I know that I will surely be swallowed up by the storm as well. But if I keep my eyes on You and Your goodness, You are glorified and I am fearless. Lord, You are my strength when I am weak. You make me brave. Faith is not something I can produce for myself but rather, faith is something You give to all those who ask. Neglecting to entrust my hopes and my plans to You is evidence of my unbelief. Help my unbelief, Lord. Help my unbelief.
You are always good, and You are always sovereign. Your love always remains. And You will always be holding me. You have always held me. You hold my future and You hold my past. And as I walk through the darkness, keep my eyes on the small steps that You light up in front of me, instead of on the unknown path ahead. Remind me of the joy that comes with being present, and rid me of the dread that comes with focusing on the future. Surround me with Your love until I am able to see and experience You face to face once I'm finally home. Until then, give me a faith free of wavering emotions. Clear my heart and my mind and reveal to me Your promises and Your everlasting, precious truth.
Love,
Mackenzie
Wednesday, October 26, 2016
I don't know what to title this one. Just read it.
I've been wanting to write a blog post for a while now. However, I have struggled to find something to write about...well, I think I have somewhat of an idea, but it's going to be really hard for me to put it in words because it's not even clear in my head. But I do think something happens when you take time out of your day to sit down and just write out your thoughts, whether you know what you're going to write about or not.
You begin to understand yourself more.
I love to blog and write songs because I tend to be bad at talking. I am not good with arguments, I struggle to defend myself, and it's hard for me to express my emotions on the spot. If you know me, you definitely know this. But I think it's beautiful that I can just sit here and as I think, my fingers move and paint words on the blank space (baaabay, and I'll write your name!) of my computer screen. For real, I am not even thinking about what to say right now, like legit, the words are popping in my head and simultaneously showing up on the screen in front of me. How in the world do our brains work.
ANYWAY. ;)
So the other day, me and my sister Haley and my friend Alyssa drove to Appleton to go see the new movie, Priceless. You may have heard of it, but I wouldn't be surprised if you haven't. I won't spoil it for you right now (because it's an awesome movie and you should all go see it ASAP), but it's basically about this dude named James who sets out on an unexpected adventure to rescue women from human trafficking.
"Woah, woah, woahh! Wha-wha-whaat? Who makes movies about that kind of stuff??"
Nobody. That's probably why you haven't heard of it.
"Not only that, but who does that kinda thing? Rescuing women from human trafficking? Who has that kind of bravery and strength? Who has that kind of respect and honor for women these days?"
.
.
.
TO MY BROTHERS:
The world tells you...
You are lazy.
You are easily-angered.
You are selfish.
You are greedy.
You are careless.
You are sloppy.
You are unemotional.
You are indifferent.
You are controlling.
You are unresponsive.
But I don't believe that.
You are hard-working.
You are slow to anger.
You are considerate.
You are generous.
You are gentle.
You are structured.
You are emotional.
You are strong.
You are respectful.
You are attentive.
TO MY SISTERS:
The world tells you...
You are not good enough.
You are weak.
You are sensitive.
You are needy.
You are an object.
You are ignorant.
You are alone.
You are incomplete.
You are overestimated.
You are useful.
But I don't believe that.
You are enough.
You are capable.
You are compassionate.
You are independent.
You are a human being.
You are knowledgeable.
You are loved.
You are complete.
You are underestimated.
You are purposeful.
Don't listen to who the world says you are. You are so much more than that. Brothers and sisters, it's time we start believing this. Not only that, but it's time we actually start living like we believe it. Stop tearing yourself down, stop wishing you were someone else, stop listening to the radio and wishing that was the life you were living. We are made for so much more than this. Let's stop being lazy and get up and do something with our lives like we mean it. Men, start acting like gentlemen. Women, start acting like ladies. Look to your Creator to find your worth and identity, and nothing else.
Let us all start breathing every breathe and living every day knowing who we are to our King.
You begin to understand yourself more.
I love to blog and write songs because I tend to be bad at talking. I am not good with arguments, I struggle to defend myself, and it's hard for me to express my emotions on the spot. If you know me, you definitely know this. But I think it's beautiful that I can just sit here and as I think, my fingers move and paint words on the blank space (baaabay, and I'll write your name!) of my computer screen. For real, I am not even thinking about what to say right now, like legit, the words are popping in my head and simultaneously showing up on the screen in front of me. How in the world do our brains work.
ANYWAY. ;)
So the other day, me and my sister Haley and my friend Alyssa drove to Appleton to go see the new movie, Priceless. You may have heard of it, but I wouldn't be surprised if you haven't. I won't spoil it for you right now (because it's an awesome movie and you should all go see it ASAP), but it's basically about this dude named James who sets out on an unexpected adventure to rescue women from human trafficking.
"Woah, woah, woahh! Wha-wha-whaat? Who makes movies about that kind of stuff??"
Nobody. That's probably why you haven't heard of it.
"Not only that, but who does that kinda thing? Rescuing women from human trafficking? Who has that kind of bravery and strength? Who has that kind of respect and honor for women these days?"
.
.
.
TO MY BROTHERS:
The world tells you...
You are lazy.
You are easily-angered.
You are selfish.
You are greedy.
You are careless.
You are sloppy.
You are unemotional.
You are indifferent.
You are controlling.
You are unresponsive.
But I don't believe that.
You are hard-working.
You are slow to anger.
You are considerate.
You are generous.
You are gentle.
You are structured.
You are emotional.
You are strong.
You are respectful.
You are attentive.
TO MY SISTERS:
The world tells you...
You are not good enough.
You are weak.
You are sensitive.
You are needy.
You are an object.
You are ignorant.
You are alone.
You are incomplete.
You are overestimated.
You are useful.
But I don't believe that.
You are enough.
You are capable.
You are compassionate.
You are independent.
You are a human being.
You are knowledgeable.
You are loved.
You are complete.
You are underestimated.
You are purposeful.
Don't listen to who the world says you are. You are so much more than that. Brothers and sisters, it's time we start believing this. Not only that, but it's time we actually start living like we believe it. Stop tearing yourself down, stop wishing you were someone else, stop listening to the radio and wishing that was the life you were living. We are made for so much more than this. Let's stop being lazy and get up and do something with our lives like we mean it. Men, start acting like gentlemen. Women, start acting like ladies. Look to your Creator to find your worth and identity, and nothing else.
Let us all start breathing every breathe and living every day knowing who we are to our King.
"For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul?"
Matthew 16:26
Friday, September 30, 2016
Why I'm Voting For Triumph
"Oh my word, I am BEYOND terrified...
Like for real! Just LOOKING at them will give you goosebumps. Neither one of them knows what they're doing, and it's clear that they have absolutely no idea what they're talking about half the time... and I'm supposed to trust one of them to be in charge of the WHOLE ENTIRE NATION?!?!?!?!?!? UGHH, this is NOT the way things were supposed to go! Like seriously, I don't want to sound mean or racist or sexist here (like HIM.) but we need someone to really put this country back together, and it's obvious that neither one of those dummies can do the job."
I don't know about you guys, but these are the kinds of things I've been hearing lately regarding the upcoming election that's taking place Tuesday, November 8th. And TBH, it's getting kinda annoying. Actually no, it's getting really, really annoying. Really really? Really really.
I bet it's annoying you too. All of the commercials, all of the ads, the debates (between the candidates AND between you and your friends), the protests, the lies, the constant back and forth... etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. etc.
Hmmph. Maybe we set our expectations too high. Maybe we thought going into this that we would finally find someone who could pick up the pieces of this broken country and put them all back together. Someone who could defeat ISIS and save the world... once and for all.
It's obvious to me (and I'm sure it is to you, as well) that neither Trump nor Clinton is capable of doing those things. Or 3rd party candidate Gary Johnson. Or my uncle Gary Johnson. Or me. Or you.
So now what? We're broken people trying to fix a broken world. We're stuck.
.
.
.
Alright, now I'm going to be honest with y'all. Some of you might get offended. But sharing what I'm about to say is worth losing all my friends.
I couldn't care less who our next president is.
And it's not because I don't care about our nation or our safety or anything like that... don't get me wrong, I do. And I'm still going to cast a vote and do my duty as an American citizen.
But why would I worry about the next person who's going to "rule" our country when God (and let me remind you who God is... the sovereign ruler of the UNIVERSE) is already sitting on the highest of thrones?
"Kenzie, how on earth can you believe there is a God in control at a time like this?"
That's a good question. This world is freakin' messed up, isn't it? But that's not because of Him... it's because of us. We sinned once, and BOOM... we were all separated from God because of it, and this world became a broken place.
"Kenzie, why would a loving God not want to be with us even when we make mistakes?"
Another good question. It's obviously important to know that God is loving, but it's just as important to know that He is holy and just. Holy, as in, perfect. Just, as in, He's not the mushy-gushy-I'll-accept-anything-you-do-as-long-as-you-do-a-few-good-things-every-once-in-a-while kind of God this world has made Him out to be.
"Kenzie, is there any way I can know God then? I will never be perfect, so..."
YES! And it's because of this: He has already triumphed over the biggest problem this world has ever known - sin. God came down to earth as a human - flesh and bone and pooping on toilets and all that - and lived a perfect life just to die for us and take on the punishment that WE deserve because of our mistakes. How cool is that??
Now, don't be confused. Sin still exists, and it will always exist. God didn't come down to remove sin from the world; rather, He came down to show us that grace is the only thing that can reconcile us to God (bring us back in relationship with Him). It's up to us whether or not we choose to believe in Him and trust in Him with our lives.
I made that decision and my life has NOT been easy by any means. But the fact that I can rest and know that Jesus is the ruler over my life is worth facing all of the trials that I will go through.
So, that's why I'm not worried. He triumphed, and He got my vote.
Who's got yours?
Saturday, September 24, 2016
The "Pumpkin-Flavored EVERYTHING!!!" Season
"To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under heaven:- Ecclesiastes 3:1-8
A time to be born,
And a time to die;
A time to plant,
And a time to pluck what is planted.
A time to kill,
And a time to heal;
A time to break down,
And a time to build up;
A time to weep,
And a time to laugh;
A time to mourn,
And a time to dance;
A time to cast away stones,
And a time to gather stones;
A time to embrace,
And a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to gain,
And a time to lose;
A time to keep,
And a time to throw away;
A time to tear,
And a time to sew;
A time to keep silence,
And a time to speak;
A time to love,
And a time to hate;
A time of war,
And a time of peace."
As the season changes from summer to autumn, I am reminded of how my spiritual season is changing as well. I think one of the reasons God created the earthly seasons is to reflect how important it is to embrace our different spiritual seasons. Like the earth needs spring, summer, fall, and winter, our souls need growth, refinement, change, and rest.
As most of you know, this past summer I had the opportunity to work at Lake Lundgren Bible Camp. I was able to serve in ways I had never served before and I was challenged each and every day. God revealed how important it is for me to rely on Him for my joy and strength in every single situation. In the same way as heat refines, God used this (hot) summer to refine me; He showed me my impurities and the ways in which I wasn't relying on Him for strength. Because I was able to recognize this, I was then able to start running to Him as my wellspring instead of relying on myself or others for fulfillment.
Now, fall is here. Can you believe it?! WOOHOO! Let's celebrate with apple picking, haunted houses, leaf piles, scarves, coffee, squash (butternut is my personal fav), cool breezes, and my favorite...pumpkin-flavored EVERYTHING!!! Okay... back to the more serious note:
I think fall is called "fall" for a reason. Not just because of how the leaves start to change and fall, but also because things in our lives start to change and fall away as well. Whether that be your kids going off to school/college, letting go of a previous job, or even just saying goodbye to an awesome summer...whatever it may be, I think we all can find something that has "fallen away" now that summer is over.
Let me be straight up: I have experienced more "fall" this fall than any other fall before (you're probably thinking to yourself, can you rephrase that Kenzie??). In other words, a lot has changed and I've lost a lot of things within the past month or so. I no longer am a counselor at LLBC, I am no longer a student in high school, my best friends are all away at college, my bank account is no longer as happy as it was before school started, etc...
As much as I love the season of fall, this spiritual season that I'm in currently is very hard to appreciate and be content in. If you know me, you know that I am very structured and that I feel secure when I have a solid plan laid out in front of me. However, this is not the way God works. As my mom always reminds me, He is not a lighthouse lighting up our whole entire journey...rather, He is a lamp unto our feet, and a light unto our path (Psalm 119:105).
Step by step, God will light the way.
Step by step, He will guide you through whatever you face.
Step by step.
Day by day.
TBH, this drives me crazy sometimes. Not knowing what He has called me to do with my life and not knowing what will happen in my future can be unbearable. But I'm beginning to realize that I only feel this way when I think that it's up to me to create my own purpose.
And the beautiful fact of the matter is, it's not.
God has that purpose already picked out for me. In fact, He had it picked out before I was even born. Before He even formed me in my mother's womb, He knew.
Even though I can't see exactly what He's doing with my life or where He wants to take me, I can still put my hope in Him and know that no matter what happens, my life will glorify Him. Whether that be through engineering, music, or bus driving...in His perfect timing, He will reveal it to me. For now, all that I can do is trust in Him and believe, with all my heart and all my soul, that He is sovereign over my life.
Things will happen that I will not be able to understand in the moment and God will call me to do things that I may not want to do. But I'll say it again; during these times, the most important thing that we can do is trust Him.
It is important to embrace every spiritual season that you are in because God will work during those times, undoubtedly. He's at work all the time! And this is what it all comes down to:
We change. Our lives change. Our plans change. Our feelings change.
Our seasons change.
But the Lord, His purpose for us, and His love for us will always remain.
Wednesday, September 7, 2016
Wisdom, Fear, and the Wise Old Man
Currently, I'm an 18 year old girl. If you know any 18 year old girls, or if you have seen any movies involving 18 year old girls, you know that we tend to love...
- late night outings
- taking risks
- hanging out with boys
- going on adventures
- playing "What are the Odds?"
- putting on make-up, dressing up, and feeling pretty
- eating a whole pint of Ben & Jerry's ice cream (in one sitting)
- driving (a little too) fast with the windows rolled down
- the thrill of a storm
What do all of these things have in common? All of these things are typically done fearlessly. To me, fearless means not being afraid of whatever outcome may come because of an action you take. Can fearlessness be good? Yes! I love hanging out with my boys Ben & Jerry while driving in a storm wearing a dress with the windows rolled down at midnight. And there's nothing at all wrong with that in and of itself. But can the outcome of fearlessness be bad? Oh yeah.
If you're a teenager like me, the last word you probably want to hear is "wisdom." When I think of wisdom, I typically think of an old man sitting on his porch and shaking his finger at a bunch of hoodlums skateboarding down the street with no helmets. Now, is this action in and of itself bad? No, not at all! Could the outcome of this action be bad? Yes! And this is why the old man is shaking his finger. He might have been skateboarding in his younger years without a helmet and he may have fallen and broken his leg. He knows the risks that are present, and that's why he doesn't approve of what the young boys are doing.
Lately I've been realizing how important it is to rely on the Lord (The Wise Old Man) for wisdom and guidance instead of pursuing folly. Folly does not only mean "foolishness", but it's also the word for a "costly ornamental building with no practical purpose." Why would someone build an expensive building that serves no purpose? What is the message this person is trying to get across? It could very possibly be that this person built the extravagant building thinking that it could reflect how extravagant he is. This person could be very prideful of himself and his talents. But like the building the prideful man made, the foolishness inside his heart does not allow him to serve a purpose.
Proverbs 1:7-9 says, "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction." Before we dig into this verse, let's define what it means to fear the Lord. Usually when you're afraid of something, you run away from it. TBH, I'm not going to run towards a hungry roaring lion chasing after me. But the kind of fear we're talking about here is different.
To fear the Lord is not to run and hide from Him, but rather to draw near to Him.
This is SO important for us as Christians to understand! To fear God is to stand in awe of Him, to revere Him, and to respect Him.The importance of fearing God is emphasized all throughout scripture, especially in the book about wisdom (Proverbs). Hmm... I wonder why that is?! Maybe God is revealing to us that there is a very strong connection between fearing God and being wise...
Proverbs 3:7 says, "Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord and depart from evil." But what does fearing God have to do with not considering ourselves wise? Well, when we think that we are wise in our own eyes, we put ourselves in a position of arrogance and pride. This takes away the humility that is present in our hearts when we rightly fear the Lord. Because of this pride, we lose trust in Him and we distance ourselves from Him because we believe that what we know is greater than what He knows.
Now I hope that you are able to see how tragic it is to consider yourself wise without the Lord. Ultimately, this leads to separation from Christ because we begin to put the trust that belongs in God in ourselves. Without Christ, we may look good and feel good, but we serve no real purpose in this world (just like the folly- the extravagant building).
If you're a non-Christian reading this post, you may feel very offended. And that's okay, because the bible isn't all mushy gushy lovey stuff. It's offensive, strong, real, and true. The fact that God had to send his one and only Son, Jesus Christ, to die for us, because we were just that sinful, is the most offensive message this world has heard.
But it's the most fearless action ever taken in history.
God knew that most people would reject the gospel and ultimately reject Him. This was the tragedy that was apt to happen, but he took the risk anyway.
And this is the one thing we can boast in.
We are here because of Christ, we breathe because of Christ, we love because of Christ, and we are saved because of Christ.
And because of all these things, we rejoice in Christ.
- late night outings
- taking risks
- hanging out with boys
- going on adventures
- playing "What are the Odds?"
- putting on make-up, dressing up, and feeling pretty
- eating a whole pint of Ben & Jerry's ice cream (in one sitting)
- driving (a little too) fast with the windows rolled down
- the thrill of a storm
What do all of these things have in common? All of these things are typically done fearlessly. To me, fearless means not being afraid of whatever outcome may come because of an action you take. Can fearlessness be good? Yes! I love hanging out with my boys Ben & Jerry while driving in a storm wearing a dress with the windows rolled down at midnight. And there's nothing at all wrong with that in and of itself. But can the outcome of fearlessness be bad? Oh yeah.
If you're a teenager like me, the last word you probably want to hear is "wisdom." When I think of wisdom, I typically think of an old man sitting on his porch and shaking his finger at a bunch of hoodlums skateboarding down the street with no helmets. Now, is this action in and of itself bad? No, not at all! Could the outcome of this action be bad? Yes! And this is why the old man is shaking his finger. He might have been skateboarding in his younger years without a helmet and he may have fallen and broken his leg. He knows the risks that are present, and that's why he doesn't approve of what the young boys are doing.
Lately I've been realizing how important it is to rely on the Lord (The Wise Old Man) for wisdom and guidance instead of pursuing folly. Folly does not only mean "foolishness", but it's also the word for a "costly ornamental building with no practical purpose." Why would someone build an expensive building that serves no purpose? What is the message this person is trying to get across? It could very possibly be that this person built the extravagant building thinking that it could reflect how extravagant he is. This person could be very prideful of himself and his talents. But like the building the prideful man made, the foolishness inside his heart does not allow him to serve a purpose.
Proverbs 1:7-9 says, "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and instruction." Before we dig into this verse, let's define what it means to fear the Lord. Usually when you're afraid of something, you run away from it. TBH, I'm not going to run towards a hungry roaring lion chasing after me. But the kind of fear we're talking about here is different.
To fear the Lord is not to run and hide from Him, but rather to draw near to Him.
This is SO important for us as Christians to understand! To fear God is to stand in awe of Him, to revere Him, and to respect Him.The importance of fearing God is emphasized all throughout scripture, especially in the book about wisdom (Proverbs). Hmm... I wonder why that is?! Maybe God is revealing to us that there is a very strong connection between fearing God and being wise...
Proverbs 3:7 says, "Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord and depart from evil." But what does fearing God have to do with not considering ourselves wise? Well, when we think that we are wise in our own eyes, we put ourselves in a position of arrogance and pride. This takes away the humility that is present in our hearts when we rightly fear the Lord. Because of this pride, we lose trust in Him and we distance ourselves from Him because we believe that what we know is greater than what He knows.
Now I hope that you are able to see how tragic it is to consider yourself wise without the Lord. Ultimately, this leads to separation from Christ because we begin to put the trust that belongs in God in ourselves. Without Christ, we may look good and feel good, but we serve no real purpose in this world (just like the folly- the extravagant building).
If you're a non-Christian reading this post, you may feel very offended. And that's okay, because the bible isn't all mushy gushy lovey stuff. It's offensive, strong, real, and true. The fact that God had to send his one and only Son, Jesus Christ, to die for us, because we were just that sinful, is the most offensive message this world has heard.
But it's the most fearless action ever taken in history.
God knew that most people would reject the gospel and ultimately reject Him. This was the tragedy that was apt to happen, but he took the risk anyway.
And this is the one thing we can boast in.
We are here because of Christ, we breathe because of Christ, we love because of Christ, and we are saved because of Christ.
And because of all these things, we rejoice in Christ.
"'Let not the wise man glory in his wisdom, let not the mighty man glory in his might, nor let the rich man glory in his riches; but let him who glories glory in this, that I am the Lord, exercising loving-kindness, judgment, and righteousness in the earth. For in these I delight,' says the Lord."
- Jeremiah 9:23-24
Tuesday, August 23, 2016
SST: Update #6 (LAST ONE!)
Hey everyone!
So, Saturday was the official last day of SST. Man. I can't believe it! It feels like just yesterday I was pulling into camp ready to begin the best summer ever...and now that it's all over, I can honestly say that it was the best summer ever. And I mean ever.
There were definitely times when I was exhausted, times where I wanted to crawl up in bed and sleep for 24 hours, times where I was absolutely drained, times where I craved one of my dad's homemade meals, times where my legs hurt so much from climbing up the hill of death, times where I was frustrated with my campers, times where everything I was doing was last minute (and if you know me, I am definitely NOT a last minute kind of person), times where the routine got repetitive....
But even more than that...
There were times where I saw 100+ kids singing and worshiping God, there were times when I had the chance to sit down one-on-one with a camper and pour out God's love and wisdom to them, there were times when I felt as if the staff was so unified- and this reminded me of what heaven is going to look like, there were times when God revealed Himself to me through His creation and nature, there were times when I totally had to rely on Him for the words to say in a certain situation and He gave me those words, there were times when prayer was so important to us that we all stopped what we were doing and circled up and prayed for whatever was going on, there were times when I just felt God's presence more than ever....oh, and there was that one time where I was going ham in a game of Nuk'em. ;)
Looking back at the summer as a whole, I can't even describe to you what an adventure it was. I met so many great friends who had an impact on my life. I had the chance to pour my heart out into the lives of kids battling things that I was blessed never to go through.
And my mission does not end here. Just because the summer is over does not mean my time serving God is. As I enter into college, I am going to strive to be that light to people that don't know Christ. What is this going to look like?
- Loving my professors even when they don't believe what I believe
- Standing up for my beliefs in front of my peers even when I'm alone
- Putting my trust in Him when everything seems to be a mess...my hair, my room, my life :P
- Forgiving others just as Christ forgave me
And it doesn't end there. Every place I step into is going to be my mission field. Whether that be a hockey game, a grocery store, an engineering class, Chuck E Cheese, the mall, a dorm room, etc. etc. etc.....
I am excited to see what God has planned for my life this next year and I can't wait to see his good plan unfold. Does that mean things will be easy??? HECK NO. Things are going to be super rough for me this next year...the whole stepping into adult life thing has already had me in tears these past couple days.
But I remember that God is sovereign in all things and I press on because of this.
Thank you for keeping up with me the whole summer. God bless y'all!
-Kenzie
So, Saturday was the official last day of SST. Man. I can't believe it! It feels like just yesterday I was pulling into camp ready to begin the best summer ever...and now that it's all over, I can honestly say that it was the best summer ever. And I mean ever.
There were definitely times when I was exhausted, times where I wanted to crawl up in bed and sleep for 24 hours, times where I was absolutely drained, times where I craved one of my dad's homemade meals, times where my legs hurt so much from climbing up the hill of death, times where I was frustrated with my campers, times where everything I was doing was last minute (and if you know me, I am definitely NOT a last minute kind of person), times where the routine got repetitive....
But even more than that...
There were times where I saw 100+ kids singing and worshiping God, there were times when I had the chance to sit down one-on-one with a camper and pour out God's love and wisdom to them, there were times when I felt as if the staff was so unified- and this reminded me of what heaven is going to look like, there were times when God revealed Himself to me through His creation and nature, there were times when I totally had to rely on Him for the words to say in a certain situation and He gave me those words, there were times when prayer was so important to us that we all stopped what we were doing and circled up and prayed for whatever was going on, there were times when I just felt God's presence more than ever....oh, and there was that one time where I was going ham in a game of Nuk'em. ;)
Looking back at the summer as a whole, I can't even describe to you what an adventure it was. I met so many great friends who had an impact on my life. I had the chance to pour my heart out into the lives of kids battling things that I was blessed never to go through.
And my mission does not end here. Just because the summer is over does not mean my time serving God is. As I enter into college, I am going to strive to be that light to people that don't know Christ. What is this going to look like?
- Loving my professors even when they don't believe what I believe
- Standing up for my beliefs in front of my peers even when I'm alone
- Putting my trust in Him when everything seems to be a mess...my hair, my room, my life :P
- Forgiving others just as Christ forgave me
And it doesn't end there. Every place I step into is going to be my mission field. Whether that be a hockey game, a grocery store, an engineering class, Chuck E Cheese, the mall, a dorm room, etc. etc. etc.....
I am excited to see what God has planned for my life this next year and I can't wait to see his good plan unfold. Does that mean things will be easy??? HECK NO. Things are going to be super rough for me this next year...the whole stepping into adult life thing has already had me in tears these past couple days.
But I remember that God is sovereign in all things and I press on because of this.
Thank you for keeping up with me the whole summer. God bless y'all!
-Kenzie
Sunday, July 31, 2016
SST: Update #5
Hello everyone!
Tomorrow marks the start of the last two weeks of youth camps here at LLBC. It is literally insane how fast time flies by here! I wish this summer would slow down...but who doesn't?!
Anyway, last week was my last week being worship leader. It's a little bittersweet, but I'm super excited to counsel again for the last home stretch we've got here! Leading worship was such an awesome opportunity and showed me a different way that I can impact the campers without being directly involved in their lives. It was a very humbling experience and made me realize that the most important thing about that role was that I would simply bring glory to God and not myself in any way.
If you're at all curious, a really popular song that has been requested over and over again by the campers here is "Lifeline" by Hillsong Young & Free. It's so fun to lead and the lyrics are great! You should all check it out. :) My favorite version of the song is by Hannah Kerr. Back in March I was actually able to see her perform in live at the Cup O Joy! I miss that place a lot actually, but I'm excited to get back in the open mic groove this fall. Come visit me!! :D (www.cupojoy.com)
So this next week we have our oldest group of campers...9th-12th grade! And I'll be counseling?! Yup...Pray for me! The SSTers joke that the teen weeks always scare us...especially if you're a counselor...but am I afraid? No way, man! I am trusting that God will use me in whatever ways He desires this week. I'm super excited! Teen weeks are always a lot of fun. Friday night we're going to have a party here at LLBC... black light 9-square, light up Nukem, s'mores, and more! I can't wait.
So TBH, I just scrolled through all my pictures on Facebook. Keyword: all. Now I'm getting all emotional just thinking about how fast our time here on earth goes. It's NUTS!!! I just want to take it all in...but is there really a right way to do that?! Even here at camp when there's like 0 data on my phone and we're all stuck out here in the boonies with no Spotify connection time still finds a way to fly by faster than ever. It's so important to realize how urgent the gospel message is and that our number one purpose here on earth as Christians is to spread it and spread God's love in every way, and in every day of our lives.
Let me repeat that...
Our number one purpose here on earth as Christians is to spread God's love in every way, and in every day of our lives.
No matter how we're feeling, no matter how close we think we our to God....we are called to fulfill this one purpose.
The past few weeks I was actually feeling very dry. I felt like I was just very used to everything...used to the routine, used to the staff, used to praying, used to the gospel, and even used to God. And let me tell you...this is not a good feeling. It's hard to describe to others and it's hard to get through dry patches in life like this. But did I? Eventually, yes. And here's how. :)
So while I was worship leader this past week, I had the opportunity to teach the Bible Study activity class. For the first half of the class I gave the campers just some tips on how to study the bible and stuff like that. For the second half, we went through the first paragraph of James and practiced studying it in depth. Here's how it goes:
"My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind. For let not that man suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways."
-James 1:2-8
I gave the kids 10 minutes to dive into this passage and discover something about it that they didn't know before. With popular passages like this, it's so easy to overlook important phrases or words that show up. When I was reading it, I noticed that in the first verse it says "when you fall into various trials," meaning that as a Christian, we're all going to fall into various trials. My trial at the moment just happened to be my loss in awe of God and the gospel. Man, but God is faithful and He will bring you through it.
Last night I spent 2 hours just looking at the stars and it was almost scary to think about how big our God is, and how powerful He is. Like, woah! We say it all the time like it means nothing, but it means everything! Maybe that's the problem...we need to just stop talking about God so casually all the time. God is...God. He is the Creator, the Ruler of all things, the Maker of you, of everyone, the Supreme Being that holds everything...EVERYTHING... in His hands.
That is not something to say to just say something.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, when you talk about God or the gospel, talk about it like you mean it. Don't just say stuff about God with indifference in your heart. You will cause yourself and others to stumble because they won't see the awesomeness of God in You....their impression of God will be their impression of you, which is boring and bland. Christian friends, promise me that you will try your best to never, ever, ever let the cross lose its wonder in your heart, because what's in your heart will be reflected in your words and actions.
Anyway, thank you guys so much for sticking with me this summer through these updates. I'll probably give ya two more after this, so keep checking in! Also, if you would still like to support me financially, I'm not stopping ya!! Go to www.llbc.org, click "give", then "donate now," and from there you can send support to me and/or other SSTers if you feel led.
Thank you so much for all your prayers! You can continue to pray that I will just be able to focus on God these last few weeks, and that the awe of God will be shown in my heart whenever I talk about Him and what He has done. You guys rock!
-Mackenzie
P.S. If you're friends with me on Facebook, you're probably wondering who the dude is in almost all my recently posted pictures. Well, his name is James and we make a great pair of goofballs together. That's all for now. More on that later. ;)
Tomorrow marks the start of the last two weeks of youth camps here at LLBC. It is literally insane how fast time flies by here! I wish this summer would slow down...but who doesn't?!
Anyway, last week was my last week being worship leader. It's a little bittersweet, but I'm super excited to counsel again for the last home stretch we've got here! Leading worship was such an awesome opportunity and showed me a different way that I can impact the campers without being directly involved in their lives. It was a very humbling experience and made me realize that the most important thing about that role was that I would simply bring glory to God and not myself in any way.
If you're at all curious, a really popular song that has been requested over and over again by the campers here is "Lifeline" by Hillsong Young & Free. It's so fun to lead and the lyrics are great! You should all check it out. :) My favorite version of the song is by Hannah Kerr. Back in March I was actually able to see her perform in live at the Cup O Joy! I miss that place a lot actually, but I'm excited to get back in the open mic groove this fall. Come visit me!! :D (www.cupojoy.com)
So this next week we have our oldest group of campers...9th-12th grade! And I'll be counseling?! Yup...Pray for me! The SSTers joke that the teen weeks always scare us...especially if you're a counselor...but am I afraid? No way, man! I am trusting that God will use me in whatever ways He desires this week. I'm super excited! Teen weeks are always a lot of fun. Friday night we're going to have a party here at LLBC... black light 9-square, light up Nukem, s'mores, and more! I can't wait.
So TBH, I just scrolled through all my pictures on Facebook. Keyword: all. Now I'm getting all emotional just thinking about how fast our time here on earth goes. It's NUTS!!! I just want to take it all in...but is there really a right way to do that?! Even here at camp when there's like 0 data on my phone and we're all stuck out here in the boonies with no Spotify connection time still finds a way to fly by faster than ever. It's so important to realize how urgent the gospel message is and that our number one purpose here on earth as Christians is to spread it and spread God's love in every way, and in every day of our lives.
Let me repeat that...
Our number one purpose here on earth as Christians is to spread God's love in every way, and in every day of our lives.
No matter how we're feeling, no matter how close we think we our to God....we are called to fulfill this one purpose.
The past few weeks I was actually feeling very dry. I felt like I was just very used to everything...used to the routine, used to the staff, used to praying, used to the gospel, and even used to God. And let me tell you...this is not a good feeling. It's hard to describe to others and it's hard to get through dry patches in life like this. But did I? Eventually, yes. And here's how. :)
So while I was worship leader this past week, I had the opportunity to teach the Bible Study activity class. For the first half of the class I gave the campers just some tips on how to study the bible and stuff like that. For the second half, we went through the first paragraph of James and practiced studying it in depth. Here's how it goes:
"My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing. If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind. For let not that man suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways."
-James 1:2-8
I gave the kids 10 minutes to dive into this passage and discover something about it that they didn't know before. With popular passages like this, it's so easy to overlook important phrases or words that show up. When I was reading it, I noticed that in the first verse it says "when you fall into various trials," meaning that as a Christian, we're all going to fall into various trials. My trial at the moment just happened to be my loss in awe of God and the gospel. Man, but God is faithful and He will bring you through it.
Last night I spent 2 hours just looking at the stars and it was almost scary to think about how big our God is, and how powerful He is. Like, woah! We say it all the time like it means nothing, but it means everything! Maybe that's the problem...we need to just stop talking about God so casually all the time. God is...God. He is the Creator, the Ruler of all things, the Maker of you, of everyone, the Supreme Being that holds everything...EVERYTHING... in His hands.
That is not something to say to just say something.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, when you talk about God or the gospel, talk about it like you mean it. Don't just say stuff about God with indifference in your heart. You will cause yourself and others to stumble because they won't see the awesomeness of God in You....their impression of God will be their impression of you, which is boring and bland. Christian friends, promise me that you will try your best to never, ever, ever let the cross lose its wonder in your heart, because what's in your heart will be reflected in your words and actions.
Anyway, thank you guys so much for sticking with me this summer through these updates. I'll probably give ya two more after this, so keep checking in! Also, if you would still like to support me financially, I'm not stopping ya!! Go to www.llbc.org, click "give", then "donate now," and from there you can send support to me and/or other SSTers if you feel led.
Thank you so much for all your prayers! You can continue to pray that I will just be able to focus on God these last few weeks, and that the awe of God will be shown in my heart whenever I talk about Him and what He has done. You guys rock!
-Mackenzie
P.S. If you're friends with me on Facebook, you're probably wondering who the dude is in almost all my recently posted pictures. Well, his name is James and we make a great pair of goofballs together. That's all for now. More on that later. ;)
Saturday, July 16, 2016
SST: Update #4
Hello everyone!
I apologize for the delay in blog posts...camp life has just been so busy lately! I'll try and catch you all up as best as I can. :)
So some of you may know that the fourth week of camp I was the fishing instructor. Now, those of you who know me are probably thinking, "What?! Mackenzie...fishing?!" Your thoughts are valid. If there's anything that I can't do, it's fishing. However, God surprised me once again and it was an awesome week!
Before I started my new position, my friend Daniel took me and James out fishing for some "practice." I didn't catch anything (woohoo!!!) but James caught something! Dan took a picture of him holding the fish and then when we looked back at the picture, we could see a fountain of pee coming out of the fish. It was hilarious! We all laughed so hard.
Anyway, that week I really enjoyed getting to know the campers that came down to the fishing shack. They were all boys, which was an interesting transition (going from interacting with girls all the time to interacting with boys all the time). It was so fun just chilling out in my camp chair watching them fish and interact with each other. There was one time when I had two brothers down there fishing, Robby and Julian, and Julian caught a fish and Robby was freaking out at him and said something to him that made the "Camper Quote Board." While Julian was trying to get the fish off the hook, Robby said:
"Julian! Just yank it off! It's gonna squirm but you gotta squeeze it like grandpa does!"
I then started to laugh to myself, and they all were looking at me like I was crazy. Luckily Julian got the fish off eventually! You may be surprised at this, but that week I didn't have to take a fish off a hook at all (PRAISE THE LORD). However, I did have to put some worms on...but hey, it wasn't too gross...
That week was also my first time being on program staff at camp. I had a lot more free time than I did counseling, and so it was very nice to relax and reenergize. I also was able to participate in the staff devos at the end of the night. It was great reconnecting with everyone in that way and learning more about God.
Anyway, this past week of camp I was the worship leader! I've been leading worship all summer, but that was my only role this week (and it will be next week, too). I love it so much! For me, it's a little stressful to play in the band, just because the songs that we do are SUPER fast and upbeat, which is awesome, but if you know my style of music it's a lot more acoustic and soft. So that's definitely been something to get used to!
Thursday nights we have campfire chapels, which means that we do chapel and worship down by the campfire circle. It's one of my favorite nights! The campers are able to sing to God while looking out at the lake and the sky and the trees. This past Thursday during one of the songs I was thinking to myself how I wanted to see the same view as they were seeing- all of God's creation. But then, God gave me the realization of how I was seeing something even more cool...all of these kids worshipping God! Once I realized that I teared up a bit. :') Man...
This is the best job ever.
I apologize for the delay in blog posts...camp life has just been so busy lately! I'll try and catch you all up as best as I can. :)
So some of you may know that the fourth week of camp I was the fishing instructor. Now, those of you who know me are probably thinking, "What?! Mackenzie...fishing?!" Your thoughts are valid. If there's anything that I can't do, it's fishing. However, God surprised me once again and it was an awesome week!
Before I started my new position, my friend Daniel took me and James out fishing for some "practice." I didn't catch anything (woohoo!!!) but James caught something! Dan took a picture of him holding the fish and then when we looked back at the picture, we could see a fountain of pee coming out of the fish. It was hilarious! We all laughed so hard.
Anyway, that week I really enjoyed getting to know the campers that came down to the fishing shack. They were all boys, which was an interesting transition (going from interacting with girls all the time to interacting with boys all the time). It was so fun just chilling out in my camp chair watching them fish and interact with each other. There was one time when I had two brothers down there fishing, Robby and Julian, and Julian caught a fish and Robby was freaking out at him and said something to him that made the "Camper Quote Board." While Julian was trying to get the fish off the hook, Robby said:
"Julian! Just yank it off! It's gonna squirm but you gotta squeeze it like grandpa does!"
I then started to laugh to myself, and they all were looking at me like I was crazy. Luckily Julian got the fish off eventually! You may be surprised at this, but that week I didn't have to take a fish off a hook at all (PRAISE THE LORD). However, I did have to put some worms on...but hey, it wasn't too gross...
That week was also my first time being on program staff at camp. I had a lot more free time than I did counseling, and so it was very nice to relax and reenergize. I also was able to participate in the staff devos at the end of the night. It was great reconnecting with everyone in that way and learning more about God.
Anyway, this past week of camp I was the worship leader! I've been leading worship all summer, but that was my only role this week (and it will be next week, too). I love it so much! For me, it's a little stressful to play in the band, just because the songs that we do are SUPER fast and upbeat, which is awesome, but if you know my style of music it's a lot more acoustic and soft. So that's definitely been something to get used to!
Thursday nights we have campfire chapels, which means that we do chapel and worship down by the campfire circle. It's one of my favorite nights! The campers are able to sing to God while looking out at the lake and the sky and the trees. This past Thursday during one of the songs I was thinking to myself how I wanted to see the same view as they were seeing- all of God's creation. But then, God gave me the realization of how I was seeing something even more cool...all of these kids worshipping God! Once I realized that I teared up a bit. :') Man...
This is the best job ever.
I definitely have days where I am just not feeling it, and there are days when I want to cuddle up in bed and stay there for hours, and there are days when I want my dad's grilled chicken more than anything...but let's be real. Being at camp the whole summer and working with awesome people and having opportunities to lead kids to Christ?!! AWESOME.
So yeah! That's how it's been here at camp. If you would like to contact me more, feel free to shoot me a Facebook message or even better, send me a letter!
Mackenzie Johnson
N18250 Lake Lane
Pembine, WI 54156
Also, I still haven't reached my financial goal for the summer, but I'm trusting that God will provide! if you would like to be apart of my mission here at camp, please visit www.llbc.org and click "give", then "donate now", then "give to LLBC", and from there you can scroll down and find my name. Thank you guys so much! Also, please pray that I would continue to find my strength, joy, and energy all in Christ. Pray that I would be able to carve out time in my day to spend with Him. Thank you all so much!
-Mackenzie
Tuesday, June 28, 2016
SST: Update #3
Hello everyone!
This week is the third week of counseling for me. I'm so excited to get to know the girls in my cabin more! They're all going into 5th grade... they're a bunch of wild little munchkins! I love it. Last week I counseled girls going into 8th grade, and my sister Faith was in my cabin. It was a lot of fun! It's so cool to interact with all the different age groups.
Last week was a little challenging for me because there was some drama in my cabin that I didn't really know how to handle. Prayers that God would give me wisdom in those kinds of situations would be appreciated so much! It was interesting having my sister in my cabin last week but it was definitely fun! I could tell that she appreciated the comfort and security she got from me being her counselor.
One of the things that stood out to me from last week was that middle school girls go through some tough stuff. Like I mentioned before, the whole drama thing started with one of my girls feeling left out, and then there was also a lot of insecurity issues they were all dealing with. Oh, the good 'ole days of middle school. Working with that age group brought back memories of myself struggling with the same kind of issues, and so it was easy to relate to them and talk to them about it. One night during debrief at the camp fire, I talked about how there are so many lies that we as girls believe about ourselves. For example...
This week is the third week of counseling for me. I'm so excited to get to know the girls in my cabin more! They're all going into 5th grade... they're a bunch of wild little munchkins! I love it. Last week I counseled girls going into 8th grade, and my sister Faith was in my cabin. It was a lot of fun! It's so cool to interact with all the different age groups.
Last week was a little challenging for me because there was some drama in my cabin that I didn't really know how to handle. Prayers that God would give me wisdom in those kinds of situations would be appreciated so much! It was interesting having my sister in my cabin last week but it was definitely fun! I could tell that she appreciated the comfort and security she got from me being her counselor.
One of the things that stood out to me from last week was that middle school girls go through some tough stuff. Like I mentioned before, the whole drama thing started with one of my girls feeling left out, and then there was also a lot of insecurity issues they were all dealing with. Oh, the good 'ole days of middle school. Working with that age group brought back memories of myself struggling with the same kind of issues, and so it was easy to relate to them and talk to them about it. One night during debrief at the camp fire, I talked about how there are so many lies that we as girls believe about ourselves. For example...
- our worth is found in what other people think about us
- we have to live up to a certain worldly standard
- we are defined by the mirror
- we need attention from guys
...and the list goes on. I then talked about how only God can define us, and that we are made in His beautiful image. I gave them each an envelope with a paper in it titled "Who I Am In Christ" with a list of bible verses underneath that showed them who they truly are. I hope they keep them forever and that they will be able to look back on them whenever they're not feeling the greatest about themselves.
After closeouts and chores Saturday, me and the other SSTers were thinking of stuff we could do. After a long week of camp, all of the staff is always ready to have some fun! We finally decided to go to Dave's Falls to take a hike and swim. Woohoo! Once we got to the swimming hole, I realized that I wasn't wearing my swimsuit and so I wouldn't be able to swim. Well, that's not what everyone else thought! Two of the guys starting chasing me around trying to get me wet, and then my friend James scooped me up and threw me in the water, fully clothed and everything (the nice thing about being in the boonies is that you never have your phone on you, and so everyone always assumes it's okay to do those kinds of things :P)! It was so fun! We played some chicken and also had a mud fight. It was truly AWESOME. After that adventure, we all went to Ranger Family Restaurant and then to a friend's house to watch She's The Man. What a day! The next day, me and some pals spontaneously went white water rafting. It was SO fun, and SO worth the $50. :D
After that, I was in my cabin just reflecting on what an awesome weekend I had. I began to think how cool God is, that He would create the little places like Dave's Falls just so that His people could enjoy His creation to the fullest, fellowshipping the way He made us to fellowship, and having fun with nothing but each other, water and mud. No phones, no internet, no board games, no TV's...just His pure creation. How cool is that?! God is so good. I can't wait for more adventures like that!
Thanks for reading! Don't forget to help me reach my financial goal this summer as well. Go to www.llbc.org, and donate to my mission from there! If you have any questions, feel free to send me a letter, a text, or a Facebook message!
-Mackenzie
Sunday, June 19, 2016
SST: Update #2
Hello all!
This past week was my very first week counseling! And let me tell you... it was SO awesome. I had a group of seven girls in my cabin, and they were all crazy and wild and just wanted to have fun! One of my favorite memories from this past week was staying in Hammock Village. Hammock Village is an area at camp where a ton of hammocks are hung on the trees in the woods for cabins to sleep in. We slept there Tuesday night, and before we went to bed I let them stay up to make s'mores from the S'more Kit we won the previous night at chapel. Flash forward to 3:30am that same night and I feel one of my girls tapping me on the shoulder saying, "It's raining!!!" So we all immediately packed up our stuff from Hammock Village and moved back to our cabin. What a night! It was fun while it lasted.
Another fun thing that I did was kayaking! Me and a bunch of girls from my cabin decided it'd be fun to give it a try...and it sure was! We all got some sun that day but it was worth it. I also got the worst kayak (it was the oldest one and got me very wet)... but hey, it was a blast. :)
I also asked my cabin if they wanted to challenge another cabin to a game of Nukem (Nukem is a camp game... it's basically volleyball except you catch the ball and throw it to the other side). Of course, they wanted to challenge a boys cabin. Bring it on! Butternut vs. Cedar. If we (Butternut) won, we would make the boys (Cedar) write a song for us and sing it in front of everyone. If they won, they would dump buckets of cold water all over our heads while we were still in our clothes. Guess who won?!!?!
...
Cedar.
So me and my girls huddled close together while they dumped two giant buckets of cold water on our heads. Yes.
As you can see, my first week was anything but boring. Even with all the fun that we had, my favorite part of the week was seeing my girls grow closer to Jesus. During cabin debrief at the end of the day, I talked to them about what they were learning about God and how they could apply that to their lives. My girls had A TON of questions about God and the bible, which I am so thankful for! It was awesome to see how God used me this past week to answer their questions. I am looking forward to hearing from them through letters throughout the summer!
Friday night to Saturday night was New Camper Experience. This was a weekend for little kids that wanted to just try camp out for a night and a day. I had the craziest girls! One of them reminded me of the young version of Mr. Frederickson's wife in the movie UP. All they wanted to do was swim, so that's what I spent my day doing. I also got several buckets of water dumped on my head again...This whole water-bucket-dumping must be a camp thing.
Alright guys, thanks so much for staying up to date with me! I appreciate all your prayers. Be praying for my brother Wesley and my sister Faith as they come to camp this next week! I'm looking forward to it so much. Also pray that God will give me a high energy level throughout the summer. Now time for church! And then... Finding Dory!
-Mackenzie
This past week was my very first week counseling! And let me tell you... it was SO awesome. I had a group of seven girls in my cabin, and they were all crazy and wild and just wanted to have fun! One of my favorite memories from this past week was staying in Hammock Village. Hammock Village is an area at camp where a ton of hammocks are hung on the trees in the woods for cabins to sleep in. We slept there Tuesday night, and before we went to bed I let them stay up to make s'mores from the S'more Kit we won the previous night at chapel. Flash forward to 3:30am that same night and I feel one of my girls tapping me on the shoulder saying, "It's raining!!!" So we all immediately packed up our stuff from Hammock Village and moved back to our cabin. What a night! It was fun while it lasted.
Another fun thing that I did was kayaking! Me and a bunch of girls from my cabin decided it'd be fun to give it a try...and it sure was! We all got some sun that day but it was worth it. I also got the worst kayak (it was the oldest one and got me very wet)... but hey, it was a blast. :)
I also asked my cabin if they wanted to challenge another cabin to a game of Nukem (Nukem is a camp game... it's basically volleyball except you catch the ball and throw it to the other side). Of course, they wanted to challenge a boys cabin. Bring it on! Butternut vs. Cedar. If we (Butternut) won, we would make the boys (Cedar) write a song for us and sing it in front of everyone. If they won, they would dump buckets of cold water all over our heads while we were still in our clothes. Guess who won?!!?!
...
Cedar.
So me and my girls huddled close together while they dumped two giant buckets of cold water on our heads. Yes.
As you can see, my first week was anything but boring. Even with all the fun that we had, my favorite part of the week was seeing my girls grow closer to Jesus. During cabin debrief at the end of the day, I talked to them about what they were learning about God and how they could apply that to their lives. My girls had A TON of questions about God and the bible, which I am so thankful for! It was awesome to see how God used me this past week to answer their questions. I am looking forward to hearing from them through letters throughout the summer!
Friday night to Saturday night was New Camper Experience. This was a weekend for little kids that wanted to just try camp out for a night and a day. I had the craziest girls! One of them reminded me of the young version of Mr. Frederickson's wife in the movie UP. All they wanted to do was swim, so that's what I spent my day doing. I also got several buckets of water dumped on my head again...This whole water-bucket-dumping must be a camp thing.
Alright guys, thanks so much for staying up to date with me! I appreciate all your prayers. Be praying for my brother Wesley and my sister Faith as they come to camp this next week! I'm looking forward to it so much. Also pray that God will give me a high energy level throughout the summer. Now time for church! And then... Finding Dory!
-Mackenzie
Sunday, June 12, 2016
SST: Update #1
Hello everyone!
So if you did not know already, this summer I am working at Lake Lundgren Bible Camp up in the north woods of Wisconsin. These past two weeks have been training time... sounds boring, right? WRONG. So far, this summer has been absolutely wonderful. As a way of keeping you all up to date, I'm planning on blogging once a week. So let me tell you all about what's been going on so far!
First off, I have been having so much fun getting to know the other staff members, being away from distractions, and enjoying God’s beautiful creation! My team this summer consists of a pretty equal amount of guys and girls. We all get along great, and I can honestly say that after the first two days it felt like we were one big happy family. We have already done a bunch of fun things together…
I am looking forward to growing even closer to all these wonderful people as the summer progresses. During training, my relationship with God has also been growing! It has been so cool to be away from the distractions of life and to completely focus my attention on Him. During my PQTs (Personal Quiet Times: an hour scheduled out of our day so we can spend time with the Lord) I have been meditating on Ephesians 4:17-32, which talks about how when we are in a relationship with the Lord, He changes us into a new person that glorifies Him. I really like the part in this passage where it talks about working with our hands what is good. This world has become so automatic, where everything you need can be done by the click of a button or with the help of some kind of machine. But God wants us, as Christians, to be working with our hands. The harder the work, the greater the reward, right?! :) Even though I’ll be facing many challenges this summer here at LLBC, I know that I’m right where God wants me and that the reward for my work will be unbelievably worth it.
Anyway, the first round of campers come in this upcoming week! I am BEYOND excited. I found out that I will be working on the worship team as well as counseling (woohoo!). Please pray that God would strengthen me and give me the words to guide my Butternut girls (Butternut is the name of the cabin I will be staying in). Also, keep in mind that my financial support goal this summer is $1,800. This means I need at least $667 more. If you would like to be apart of my mission here at camp, please visit www.llbc.org and click "give", then "donate now", then "give to LLBC", and from there you can scroll down and find my name. I love you guys, and I can’t thank you enough for loving me! <3
-Mackenzie
So if you did not know already, this summer I am working at Lake Lundgren Bible Camp up in the north woods of Wisconsin. These past two weeks have been training time... sounds boring, right? WRONG. So far, this summer has been absolutely wonderful. As a way of keeping you all up to date, I'm planning on blogging once a week. So let me tell you all about what's been going on so far!
First off, I have been having so much fun getting to know the other staff members, being away from distractions, and enjoying God’s beautiful creation! My team this summer consists of a pretty equal amount of guys and girls. We all get along great, and I can honestly say that after the first two days it felt like we were one big happy family. We have already done a bunch of fun things together…
- We went on a canoe trip to an island and had a grill out!
- We played volleyball games until 12 A.M. the other night! (I regretted this the next morning…)
- We went to church at Redemption Hill in Iron Mountain on Sunday (and then went to Jimmy Johns afterwards...yum.)
- We all took our swim tests in the lake today and played with a bunch of tadpoles!
- We helped build a playground at the Pembine school!
I am looking forward to growing even closer to all these wonderful people as the summer progresses. During training, my relationship with God has also been growing! It has been so cool to be away from the distractions of life and to completely focus my attention on Him. During my PQTs (Personal Quiet Times: an hour scheduled out of our day so we can spend time with the Lord) I have been meditating on Ephesians 4:17-32, which talks about how when we are in a relationship with the Lord, He changes us into a new person that glorifies Him. I really like the part in this passage where it talks about working with our hands what is good. This world has become so automatic, where everything you need can be done by the click of a button or with the help of some kind of machine. But God wants us, as Christians, to be working with our hands. The harder the work, the greater the reward, right?! :) Even though I’ll be facing many challenges this summer here at LLBC, I know that I’m right where God wants me and that the reward for my work will be unbelievably worth it.
Anyway, the first round of campers come in this upcoming week! I am BEYOND excited. I found out that I will be working on the worship team as well as counseling (woohoo!). Please pray that God would strengthen me and give me the words to guide my Butternut girls (Butternut is the name of the cabin I will be staying in). Also, keep in mind that my financial support goal this summer is $1,800. This means I need at least $667 more. If you would like to be apart of my mission here at camp, please visit www.llbc.org and click "give", then "donate now", then "give to LLBC", and from there you can scroll down and find my name. I love you guys, and I can’t thank you enough for loving me! <3
-Mackenzie
Tuesday, May 17, 2016
Spots
What motivates you? Is it...
- people?
- money?
- magazine articles?
- Buzzfeed quizzes?
- time limits?
- a "goodnight text" from your significant other?
- dessert at the end of the day?
Whatever it is, we all have something that motivates us. Otherwise, why would we be breathing in and out, in and out, in and out, in and out...? Why would we want our heart to keep beating? Why would we want to get up in the morning? Why would we even want to be alive? Just...why?
Some days you may find yourself repeatedly asking this question of why. Asking "why" is good. It draws you closer to what your purpose is here on earth...while your heart is still beating, while you are still young, while you still have so much unpredictable life ahead of you.
So let's dig a little deeper then. What is your purpose? Is it to please people or to be accepted by people? Is it to earn money? Is it to change the world?
What are you living for?
or for some people, the better question is...
Who are you living for?
This is a question that I believe the hearts of people revolve around. If we dig deep into the heart and soul of every person alive on this earth right now at this very moment, we would find a spot meant for something. A root. A foundation. Something that holds everything else in our lives into place. Something that everything else branches off of.
What we choose to put in this spot is up to us.
Now the question is, how do we know what to put in our spot?
JEEESSSSUUUUSSSS!!! Typical Sunday school answer. I know... WAIT! Don't close this blog post yet... I know you've heard it a thousand times, and I know you don't want to hear it again. I know you think that God is irrelevant and just a dude up high in heaven town loving people and doing His God job. But listen.
However cliche this "JEEESSSSUUUUSSSS!!!" answer may sound to you, I think it's beneficial for us all to stop for a second to think about what this really means...to think long and hard about what we're doing and why we're doing it.
Why are you studying for that AP test tomorrow? To glorify God.
Why do you eat healthy and work out every day? To glorify God.
Why are you on the basketball team? To glorify God.
Why are you taking your pets for a walk today? To glorify God.
Why do you play guitar? To glorify God.
Why do you plant tomatoes in your backyard? To glorify God.
See the pattern?
God, the creator of the universe, the creator of the mountains, the creator of the oceans, the creator of the souls... the One who reigns from heaven, the kind and passionate and unimaginably powerful and almighty Being...
I want Him to be my motivation.
The one who became flesh to dwell among his enemies, to live a humble and perfect life and resist temptation... the one who then died for us so that we just might get to know Him... all because of his vast love for us...
I want Him to be in my spot.
"Therefore, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God."
1 Corinthians 10:31
Wednesday, March 23, 2016
Don't dance around to "Dude Looks Like A Lady" after you find out you failed your physics test. Here's why.
It's midnight. I'm wearing my most comfy sweatshirt and my most comfy sweatpants, which both happen to be the same exact shade of gray, of course (unfortunately I can't wear the two together out in public because of this... I'd look like a gray blob or fish or something). I'm listening to piano lullabies by Hillsong Kids (which I highly recommend, it's great study music). Tomorrow is a snow day and also the first day of spring break 2016 (woohoo!). I had a BLT and some homemade onion rings for dinner tonight (my dad is an awesome cook). And I just spent the past hour and a half reading God's word (Passion Week yo).
Life is good.
Good... what does this mean? When someone says, "how are you?" we always tend to reply with "good." But what is good?
Good is the "go-to." It's a simple word that can be used to answer complicated questions. For example:
Q: Who is God?
A: God is good.
Q: How was your day?
A: My day was good.
Q: How are you?
A: I'm doing good.
Q: Why do you like this song so much?
A: Because it's good.
or the text conversation I'm sure everyone is familiar with:
Person 1: hey
Person 2: hey
Person 1: how r u
Person 2: good u
Person 1: good
Read at 5:37pm
Good. Weird, I just typed that and stared at it for a while and now it looks like the weirdest word ever. Good is a weird word, but not just because of the way it sounds after you say it 20 times. Good is weird because we can use it to replace a bunch of words that we don't feel like saying, and it's accepted. It's normal. It's just what we as humans do.
A lot of the time I find myself scrolling through someone's Instagram or Facebook and thinking to myself, "wow, her life looks so good." From my perspective, it seems as if she has zero problems and zero worries. Just a cute boyfriend, a cute dog, a cute tattoo, a cute family, and a Starbucks drink. Perfection.
But deep down, everything is NOT as "good" as she makes it out to be.
That girl is struggling with keeping up her grades. She also works seven days a week to pay for college. Her parents are in the middle of a divorce. Her boyfriend only wants her for sex.
But all the while, she puts on her make-up, dresses herself in her cute clothes, throws a smile on her face, and when someone asks her "how are you?" she replies with "good."
It's not okay to be good when things are not okay.
For me, the past few days have been extremely rough. I'm sure everyone has days, weeks, or maybe even months like this. I realized that I was having a difficult time when a friend just casually asked me "how are you?" and I replied with "good." because it was something I was so used to saying. But immediately after I said the weird four letter word, I thought to myself, "Kenzie, you are not good. Right now you are sad. Be sad."
I felt like crying. When you feel like crying, cry your eyes out. Don't fake it. Feel your feelings, in the realest way possible. Don't try to ignore or cover up something that's been bothering you.
1. Confront yourself. Ask yourself, "how are you?" and respond in the most honest, and the realest way possible. Write it down if it helps.
2. Confront people. If someone caused you to feel something, anything, let them know... in whatever way you feel most comfortable. It's difficult to be vulnerable and open because it exposes the deepest parts of our hearts, but it's what we need to do.
3. Confront God. Pray. Ask Him questions like, "why?" and "how?" While asking these questions, be sure to humble yourself before Him. God is not a wimpy God, and we little specks of dust in this giant universe need to realize how big He is when we come to talk to Him.
Your feelings are always valid.
I love the movie Inside Out. *SPOILER ALERT* It's about how someone can be joyful and sad at the same time. But how in the world does this happen? Here's how:
"Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God. Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us." Romans 5:2-5
Boom. The Lord is the only one who can bring us joy in our sadness. But what does this kind of joy look like? Will I be dancing around my house to "Dude Looks Like A Lady" right after I find out I failed my physics test? NO! This joy is just simply knowing that God has a purpose for whatever you may be going through. If you trust in Him, He will use the trials you face to shape you and mold you into the strong and wise person He has created you to be.
Life is good.
Good... what does this mean? When someone says, "how are you?" we always tend to reply with "good." But what is good?
Good is the "go-to." It's a simple word that can be used to answer complicated questions. For example:
Q: Who is God?
A: God is good.
Q: How was your day?
A: My day was good.
Q: How are you?
A: I'm doing good.
Q: Why do you like this song so much?
A: Because it's good.
or the text conversation I'm sure everyone is familiar with:
Person 1: hey
Person 2: hey
Person 1: how r u
Person 2: good u
Person 1: good
Read at 5:37pm
Good. Weird, I just typed that and stared at it for a while and now it looks like the weirdest word ever. Good is a weird word, but not just because of the way it sounds after you say it 20 times. Good is weird because we can use it to replace a bunch of words that we don't feel like saying, and it's accepted. It's normal. It's just what we as humans do.
A lot of the time I find myself scrolling through someone's Instagram or Facebook and thinking to myself, "wow, her life looks so good." From my perspective, it seems as if she has zero problems and zero worries. Just a cute boyfriend, a cute dog, a cute tattoo, a cute family, and a Starbucks drink. Perfection.
But deep down, everything is NOT as "good" as she makes it out to be.
That girl is struggling with keeping up her grades. She also works seven days a week to pay for college. Her parents are in the middle of a divorce. Her boyfriend only wants her for sex.
But all the while, she puts on her make-up, dresses herself in her cute clothes, throws a smile on her face, and when someone asks her "how are you?" she replies with "good."
It's not okay to be good when things are not okay.
For me, the past few days have been extremely rough. I'm sure everyone has days, weeks, or maybe even months like this. I realized that I was having a difficult time when a friend just casually asked me "how are you?" and I replied with "good." because it was something I was so used to saying. But immediately after I said the weird four letter word, I thought to myself, "Kenzie, you are not good. Right now you are sad. Be sad."
I felt like crying. When you feel like crying, cry your eyes out. Don't fake it. Feel your feelings, in the realest way possible. Don't try to ignore or cover up something that's been bothering you.
1. Confront yourself. Ask yourself, "how are you?" and respond in the most honest, and the realest way possible. Write it down if it helps.
2. Confront people. If someone caused you to feel something, anything, let them know... in whatever way you feel most comfortable. It's difficult to be vulnerable and open because it exposes the deepest parts of our hearts, but it's what we need to do.
3. Confront God. Pray. Ask Him questions like, "why?" and "how?" While asking these questions, be sure to humble yourself before Him. God is not a wimpy God, and we little specks of dust in this giant universe need to realize how big He is when we come to talk to Him.
Your feelings are always valid.
I love the movie Inside Out. *SPOILER ALERT* It's about how someone can be joyful and sad at the same time. But how in the world does this happen? Here's how:
"Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God. Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us." Romans 5:2-5
Boom. The Lord is the only one who can bring us joy in our sadness. But what does this kind of joy look like? Will I be dancing around my house to "Dude Looks Like A Lady" right after I find out I failed my physics test? NO! This joy is just simply knowing that God has a purpose for whatever you may be going through. If you trust in Him, He will use the trials you face to shape you and mold you into the strong and wise person He has created you to be.
Like I said, these past few days have been extremely rough for me. Am I still a little sad? Yeah. But I can rejoice knowing that the Lord is... the Lord! He knows what He's doing, all the time. Even when I don't see the purpose, He does. And that's all that matters.
"And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28
"And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28
Wednesday, February 24, 2016
Not By Bread Alone
In Matthew 4, Satan tempts Jesus. Notice that Satan doesn't attempt to tempt Jesus...but he actually tempts Him. Isn't that interesting? I find it fascinating because Jesus is sinless yet he was tempted, or had a desire, to sin.
Jesus had a desire to...SIN?!!?!?!!!!?!? Am I reading into this right???? I don't even know honestly, but that's what I'm getting here, so correct me if I'm wrong.
So, I guess we can conclude that being tempted itself is not a sin. After all, we live in a world full of temptation, and there's no way to avoid it. I believe that the world we live in today tempts us to act on things that distract us. Don't believe me? Well, let's see what we've got here:
Jesus had a desire to...SIN?!!?!?!!!!?!? Am I reading into this right???? I don't even know honestly, but that's what I'm getting here, so correct me if I'm wrong.
So, I guess we can conclude that being tempted itself is not a sin. After all, we live in a world full of temptation, and there's no way to avoid it. I believe that the world we live in today tempts us to act on things that distract us. Don't believe me? Well, let's see what we've got here:
- Social Media
- Snapchat
- Tumblr
- Texting
- You get the idea.
- Television
- Magazines
- Buzzfeed quizzes
- Shopping
- Ads
- Commercials
- Music (yes, I said it, even though it was hard too...)
- Food
- Movies
- Friends
- Politics
- Boyfriends
- Girlfriends
- Family
- Sports
- Clothing
- Art
- Etc.
- Etc.
- Fill in the blank. What distracts you?
Now are all of these things I just listed necessarily "bad?" No. These things are only Satan's devices, or tools, that he is able to use to distract us or tempt us. And so while we watch commercials or movies or read magazines, we need to do so with the utmost of CAUTION. Even the littlest thought that runs through our heads while scrolling on Facebook or reading a magazine can be extremely harmful to us, because one thought becomes another, and then another, and they just keep building up.
So how is distraction related to temptation? Well, Satan's main goal is to use whatever he can to distract us from God. In other words, his goal is to make us believe that we need to rely on other things to satisfy us besides Jesus.
Again, we see in Matthew 4 Jesus was hungry from fasting for 40 days and Satan told him that he could just turn a bunch of stones into bread, but he refused and said that "man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God."
Well what the heck does this Jesus language mean.
When Jesus said that "man shall not live by bread alone," he's saying that we shouldn't rely on or live off of the things that we think we need. Whether it be bread, Twitter, or even music (yes, I said it again...). If we live off of these things, Satan is succeeding in distracting us from the one true thing we need, which is Jesus.
He then says that we should live "by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God." Woah. Coolio. This means that we should live off of Jesus; He should be our one and only source of fuel. He's the only one who can fully satisfy and bring us the most joy unlike anything else this world offers.
So is it wrong to scroll through Facebook or read into politics or hang out with your boyfriend or girlfriend? NO! Not at all. To sum it all up, Jesus just warns us that Satan uses these things to tempt us into thinking harmful thoughts or doing bad things. He also says that we need to first find our full satisfaction in Jesus before turning to these other things to fuel us or bring us happiness.
DARE: Think about what distracts you from God the most. The first thing that pops into your head...STOP. Okay, now take that thing, whatever it may be, and give it up for a day. Just one day (or more, depending on how enthusiastic you are).
God uses the time we give to Him. When we don't have all those distractions surrounding us, we are finally able to hear God speaking to us more clearly. You're probably thinking, "well I'd like to hear God actually shout something in my ear, that'd be pretty cool." Hate to bust your bubble but that's not really the way it works. God speaks to us when we pray and when we study His Word. So use your extra time away from your distraction to do so, and you might find out something super cool that God has been trying to tell ya.
Alright, well creds to Jack Rymer for your latest blog post and for inspiring me to write this one. Peace 'n blessin's to ya.
Monday, February 15, 2016
'Tis So Sweet
THE PROBLEM
You're a senior in high school and it's already almost March. You have no idea what you're doing with the rest of your life. You don't even know where you'll be at school next year, you haven't even had a boyfriend yet, you overthink literally everything, you take naps when you should be doing something productive, you won't ever have enough money to pay for college, you know that scholarships just aren't going to come through, you have to put up with everyone telling you to do different things, you watch all your friends get accepted to their dream schools, and you watch all of them fall in love and actually celebrate Valentine's Day while you sit in your room finding the derivative of an absolute value function.
THE (temporary) PEACE
Movies, music, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat, Pinterest, ice cream, friends, family, TV, shopping, money, magazines, books, art, guitar, exercise, texting, knitting, etc. etc. etc.
THE (everlasting) PEACE
Movies, music, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat, Pinterest, ice cream, friends, family, TV, shopping, money, magazines, books, art, guitar, exercise, texting, knitting, etc. etc. etc.
When I start to worry, the first place my mind goes to is not always Jesus. Why would it be, anyway? He's not really going to come through anyway... how can He help me when He's not here to actually apply for scholarships for me and write that essay that I've been holding off for a couple weeks now?
Well I don't know about you, but that'd be pretty cool if Jesus could do all of those things for me. He'd REALLY be my Savior then. I feel like I'm in this all alone, trying to figure out this whole life deal all by myself. Maybe I should just forget about this whole Jesus thing. I'd rather listen to music or go shopping, trusting in God is too hard. I mean, I believe in Him, but I don't actually believe in Him...
Have you ever felt like this? I feel like as Christians we have a tendency to over-complicate things that are, in reality, quite simple. Why the heck do we do this? It just gives us more unneeded stress. I could really draw out this blog post, but I don't feel like I need to because the idea that I'm trying to get across is so simple.
Trust in Jesus.
There's no point in trusting temporary things because they will go. Everything will go. Everything will disappoint you, except the God who created your life, the same God that has a plan for your life if You just trust in Him.
So I dare you to stop looking for temporary peace, and start seeking the God that will provide you with everlasting peace. You may be thinking that this is such a weird idea...trusting in something that you can't see, hear, feel, touch, etc.
It is.
That's why most people just don't even give Him a chance, because the idea of a God who loves YOU - a small raindrop in this ocean of people, a speck of dust in a mansion full of beautiful things - is so extremely abstract and not even understandable.
But it's the most beautiful thing you can ever do- to put your trust in something rare and beautiful and foreign in this superficial culture we are surrounded by each and every day.
And I'll leave it at that. Peace 'n blessins.
You're a senior in high school and it's already almost March. You have no idea what you're doing with the rest of your life. You don't even know where you'll be at school next year, you haven't even had a boyfriend yet, you overthink literally everything, you take naps when you should be doing something productive, you won't ever have enough money to pay for college, you know that scholarships just aren't going to come through, you have to put up with everyone telling you to do different things, you watch all your friends get accepted to their dream schools, and you watch all of them fall in love and actually celebrate Valentine's Day while you sit in your room finding the derivative of an absolute value function.
THE (temporary) PEACE
Movies, music, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat, Pinterest, ice cream, friends, family, TV, shopping, money, magazines, books, art, guitar, exercise, texting, knitting, etc. etc. etc.
THE (everlasting) PEACE
When I start to worry, the first place my mind goes to is not always Jesus. Why would it be, anyway? He's not really going to come through anyway... how can He help me when He's not here to actually apply for scholarships for me and write that essay that I've been holding off for a couple weeks now?
Well I don't know about you, but that'd be pretty cool if Jesus could do all of those things for me. He'd REALLY be my Savior then. I feel like I'm in this all alone, trying to figure out this whole life deal all by myself. Maybe I should just forget about this whole Jesus thing. I'd rather listen to music or go shopping, trusting in God is too hard. I mean, I believe in Him, but I don't actually believe in Him...
Have you ever felt like this? I feel like as Christians we have a tendency to over-complicate things that are, in reality, quite simple. Why the heck do we do this? It just gives us more unneeded stress. I could really draw out this blog post, but I don't feel like I need to because the idea that I'm trying to get across is so simple.
Trust in Jesus.
There's no point in trusting temporary things because they will go. Everything will go. Everything will disappoint you, except the God who created your life, the same God that has a plan for your life if You just trust in Him.
So I dare you to stop looking for temporary peace, and start seeking the God that will provide you with everlasting peace. You may be thinking that this is such a weird idea...trusting in something that you can't see, hear, feel, touch, etc.
It is.
That's why most people just don't even give Him a chance, because the idea of a God who loves YOU - a small raindrop in this ocean of people, a speck of dust in a mansion full of beautiful things - is so extremely abstract and not even understandable.
But it's the most beautiful thing you can ever do- to put your trust in something rare and beautiful and foreign in this superficial culture we are surrounded by each and every day.
And I'll leave it at that. Peace 'n blessins.
Thursday, February 11, 2016
What Happens When Christians DON'T Drink Coffee
Christians: You are a (modern day) Christian if...
you listen to Hillsong United.
you drink coffee.
you own at least one beanie.
your bible has at least ten pages completely FULL of notes/highlights/circles.
you blog (lol).
you've been to bible camp.
you have at least one verse written on paper hanging up in your room somewhere.
you own 38472938 journals.
you have (or plan to get) a tattoo of something to do with your faith.
you are "intentional."
you want to get married young.
you want to have at least three kids.
you own a pair of Toms.
you're ultimate goal is to get a picture with little black kids from a third world country.
Boom. There it is. This is what being a Christian is like today. If you fit all of these descriptions, you're on your way to heaven - no doubt. Oh, but if you fit less than, like, fourteen, uhmm...sorry, this is awkward, and there's no other way to put it, but I guess I'll just say it...
you don't belong with us.
World: Wait a second. HOLD UP. Since when did Christianity become a club? I'm so confused, and I'm lost...I need Jesus, I know I do, but I'm not a hipster or a coffee drinker or a Toms-wearer. What should I do?
Christians: We told you already! We can't help you. We only want to help those who are starving and thirsty in third world countries... like the little black children? Come on, you know this. They deserve Jesus more than you do. And you listen to...Rihanna? Seriously? Oh, and you over there...you have green hair? Oh, and you, what is that in your hands? A book on evolution? Lies. I can't deal with this.
World: Wait, don't leave! I know it may not seem like we want your help, and I can't believe we're actually admitting this...but we need you! I know we may come off as intimidating or different, but we are looking for love...will you help us?
Christians: I'm too busy tonight, I have to plan my mission trip to Africa, go to a bible study, and I just HAVE to fill another ten pages of my bible with notes and doodles. Sorry. God bless! xoxo
What. In. The. World. Are. We. Doing.
Lately, I've been trying to find the reason why the world looks at Christians like we're completely whacked up...and I think I might have found it.
We don't have enough of the one thing we need more than anything else...more than Toms, more than coffee, more than theology, more than Rend Collective, and even more than C.S. Lewis quotes.
We don't have enough of the real Jesus.
The fake Jesus tells us to invite our best friends over for dinner for a bible study/gossip session.
The real Jesus tells us to take that girl or boy that no one talks to at school out to dinner.
The fake Jesus tells us it's okay to look down upon everyone else who isn't saved, just because they're not saved.
The real Jesus tells us to humble ourselves, and to not judge one another.
The fake Jesus tells us to seclude ourselves from the world. After all, it's poison.
The real Jesus tells us to be in the world, sharing the good news to the people that are the hardest to share it to.
No wonder the world is so confused with how we act. The one thing that we as Christians say we follow is the real Jesus...but they see us following this fake Jesus.
And who the heck wants a fake Jesus when you can have the real One?
Following the real Jesus is not a competition between your Christian friends of who's bible looks most distressed or a race to see who will change their profile picture to a picture of themselves surrounded by little black kids in Africa first.
Following the real Jesus is a lot more simpler. This is what it looks like:
You are a Christian if...
you believe that Jesus Christ was God in human flesh, and that He came to this earth so that we might be saved through His death on the cross.
you have a relationship with the Lord, and you pursue Him each and every day.
Boom. There it is. Simple.
And as far as I'm concerned, you can have green hair, gauges, tattoos of mermaids on your arm, AND have a relationship with the Lord God Almighty.
Christianity is NOT a club, and we need to stop acting like it is. Don't get me wrong - it's okay to be a Christian and like coffee and own at least one beanie. But it's not okay to seclude others who need to know the Lord who are completely different than this stereotype. We need to reach out to people...and maybe for you that means going to Africa, or maybe it means (doing the even scarier thing than going to Africa and) talking to that girl or boy who sits next to you in class with the gauges.
Whatever it may be, listen to what the real Jesus is calling you to do. Ditch the fake Jesus.
Tell the world that they belong with us.
Thursday, January 28, 2016
Love Stories
Picture this.
You're sitting alone on a bench in the park. You've had a long day, and this is the perfect place to come and relax. The sun shines high and bright in the sky and the clouds move slowly. You breathe in the summertime air. All of a sudden, he walks up and introduces himself, and he sits right next to you. You're absolutely shocked that this (very cute) boy would ever want to talk to someone like you, but you go with it. And soon enough, you find yourself in a great conversation with this person you only met a few hours ago.
He gives you his number, and says that he'll call you later. And sure enough, while your sitting at home that night just about to turn on Netflix, you hear your phone ring. It's him. You pick up nervously (and secretly excitedly) and he begins to tell you how happy he was that he mustered up the strength to sit next to you on the bench that day. The two of you laugh on opposite lines, on opposite sides of town. He asks you if he could take you out to dinner sometime, and you agree without hesitation.
Flash forward a few years, and you're sitting on the same bench, with the same boy. You both sit in silence for a few minutes, just appreciating the presence of the other person. Next thing you know, he gets down on one knee and pulls out a ring, meant just for you. Of course, you say yes.
Isn't this what we all dream of? A "movie-scene" kind of relationship, right? A perfect beginning, and a perfect end. Meeting someone randomly and unexpectedly in the most adorable way, falling in love by the second, and eventually getting married to live the rest of your lives together.
For the longest time, I've had this preconceived notion that this is the only way a relationship can be. You must talk talk on the phone every single night, plan to see each other every single weekend, take the cutest pictures together and post them on Facebook for all your friends to see...etc. etc. Sounds perfect, right? Well there's something about perfection that isn't exactly perfect.
Perfection = pressure. If I aim for perfection in everything that I do, I will also put pounds and pounds of pressure and stress on myself because perfection can only be achieved in the one way that I want it to be. Everything may seem beautiful when it's perfect...but if every relationship started perfectly and flawlessly, without any awkwardness, all of our stories would be the same.
A story. Something you can tell, something you can remember, something you can look back on and laugh at or cry at. It's your own. Every relationship has it's own story. There is no "right" and "wrong" here, and there is no such thing as a perfect story because all of our idealizations are based on worldly things (what we see in movies, music, books, media, etc.). If your idea of a "perfect" relationship is keeping up your Snapchat streak, texting every. single. second. of. every. single. day, or going on perfect cute little dates, then there is something BIG you're missing.
It's okay to be awkward...like real awkward. It's okay to not even talk at all for a day. It's okay to be bluntly honest. It's okay to not be perfect. All these "non-perfect things" make all of our stories unique and beautiful. If we choose to embrace the fact that our relationships didn't start in the most perfect way, or the fact that our first kiss didn't go as planned, all those pounds and pounds of pressure will be taken off. You'll begin to realize that this is your story, and there is none that can compare.
I dare you to do things the non-perfect way. Maybe it's starting to talk to a girl/boy online that you've never even met before. Maybe it's embracing the fact that your first kiss is going to be straight up awkward. Maybe it's being straight up honest and getting your heart broken.
Whatever it may be...
it will be real, because it won't be perfect.
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